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V-Card Diaries: Senka "I've been taught that a man will find you disgusting if you aren't a virgin"

Today we're highlighting Senka in Utah, a budding feminist who's says she's afraid of sex, partly because she doesn't feel ready (which is pretty natural), but also because of all the slut-shaming she's heard (which is pretty shitty). We hope all our readers can send a whole bunch of support her way! If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. Tell us about yourself:

I am 14 and live in UT. I like to think of myself as a feminist, despite nobody taking any of my opinions seriously. They tell me any stories I've heard from fellow feminists are just people "pulling my leg".

How do you define virginity?

Societal. It's nothing but a little flap of skin that means you've had sex, yet society has deemed it worthy of our time, so we make a huge fuss about it whenever we can. I define it as just an excuse to be able to hurt and control people. If you're a virgin, fine. If you aren't, fine.

Tell us your story

I'm a virgin. In part it's because sex doesn't interest me in the slightest, some because I have no clue what my sexuality is, and also because of social norms. I'm kind of afraid of sex because of slut-shaming, and I'm afraid people won't like me if I try it. I've also been taught that a man will find you disgusting and not want to have a relationship with you if you aren't a virgin, not by my mother, who doesn't want to talk about it, but by society and my friends. To tell the truth, I never thought about it much before this year, I always thought sex = evil = pregnant = death. I'm taking it to the extremes, but I kind of wanted to share my thoughts.