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V-Card Diaries: YesIAm24 "For years I was scared out of my mind about sex. Not just scared but downright phobic"

Today we're highlighting YesIAm24 in  New Orleans . She wrote us *right after* having sex for the first time–after being scared for years–and she really enjoyed it. YAY! If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. Tell us about yourself:

I am a 24 year old female who just recently gained her full womanhood by participating in the beautiful act of sexual relations. Currently, I reside in New Orleans but originally I am from Dallas, TX where I will be moving back in December. My boyfriend lives there and I am extremely excited (for obvious reasons). He is the best.

How do you define virginity?

The realization that you can connect with someone physically by literally becoming attached to them in a way that makes you squeal with joy. Honestly, I view virginity as a way to make people feel awful about a wonderful way as a way to "protect" them from ruining something amazing. But really this is something everyone should be free to explore without guilt. Your first time most likely won't be your last time. It certainly shouldn't be anyway.

Tell us your story:

For years, I was scared out of my mind about SEX. Not just scared but down right phobic. My friends found it to be a joke and would tease me endlessly about my fear. I would literally run screaming from the room when my mom would try to talk to me about SEX. Thankfully, I found this amazing guy who was extremely understanding and patient.

Personally, personal touch and time is very important to me and since SEX had been made into such a big deal in my life by religious beliefs and teachings and such I didn't know what to do. I knew it had to happen sometime, I couldn't get married without it but I was terrified I wouldn't like it or that it wouldn't work then there would be this horridly awful thing to deal with a person you JUST made a huge life commitment to. Plus everyone would know. That freaked me out the most, that everyone would KNOW about the SEX.

Anyway, this amazing man talked with me about it even before we dated. We could talk about anything. He pursued me for five months while I was traveling the southern region of the US. Then we started being committed only to each other. And I realized I actually wanted to have sex with him. I didn't even want to have sex with the guy I was in love with for 8 years *gag* I have never really wanted to have sex with just ANYONE, but I knew I wanted to share it with HIM. He is the one I wanted to share my first time with even if we don't end up together forever. If anyone is "worthy", this one certainly is for various reasons. He was so considerate and sweet, checking up on me in case I was freaking out inside, but I wasn't. I actually didn't freak out at all. This was supposed to happen and I was so happy. His penis was inside my vagina and I didn't start instantly burning (as in hellfire and brimstone, thank God either way). I did not lose anything. I gained my womanhood.

Finally, I do not have to hide behind not knowing or being "innocent" which really means "reason for others to feel superior." I can't wait to move home and be a woman more often. By the way, this just happened on October 11, 2012.