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V-Card Diaries: Tony "I'll go down in history as the guy who couldn’t get laid"

Today we're highlighting California who's had financial ups and downs and once lost everything but his virginity. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. Tell us about yourself:

I am a 42 year-old virgin from Orange County California. I recently participated in a virgin panel on CBC Radio One's "The Current" [Note: We wrote about it here].

How do you define virginity?

I define virginity as never having sexual intercourse.

Tell us your story

When I was a freshman in high school I was a total dork. I was skinny with bad acne and a bad haircut. Kids laughed at me, so I became a bookworm. I studied night and day and committed myself to school. This was in the go-go days of the mid 80’s, when the movie Wall Street came out. Wall Street got me hooked on the stock market. I was 14 years old and I was reading The Wall Street Journal, studying charts and graphs, and talking to people about equities, commodities and currencies. I figured if girls were going to reject me, then I was going to work for a big investment bank and make a fortune.

I was around seventeen when I first really wanted to have sex (or what most people refer to as “horny”). When I got out of college in 1992 I was still a virgin (and no job offers from the big investment houses).

By the end of the 90’s my career finally took off and I was making money. I was living in Texas in 1999 when I met a girl at the TGI Friday’s who liked me. She said she’d meet me at TGI’s the following night and we’d go from there. She stood me up, and at that point I just gave up. I was so angry that I boycotted women. Call it a “girlcott.”

The next decade came and went, and when the economy tanked in 2008, I lost everything – my job, my career, my house, my company car, my 401(k). In the span of about 6 months I lost everything but my virginity.

Since then, I’ve picked up the pieces, but the damage is done. When my book came out I got some notoriety: people e-mailed me and called and said how nice it was that I was still “pure.” Catholics took to this; older Catholic women are very traditional and they think it’s noble. Most of the e-mails I get these days are from mothers trying to set me up with their daughters, which is totally ridiculous. This isn’t what I wanted for my life–not exactly how I planned things.

They have no idea the pain and humiliation that goes with being a 42 year-old virgin. It stinks. I don’t want to be a virgin anymore. It’s not a good legacy. Not something to be proud of. Think about it: if I get hit by a bus tomorrow I’ll go down in history as the guy who couldn’t get laid. I don’t want to be remembered for that. I just want to find a girl, do it, and have a normal life. Maybe even fall in love and have a family.