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V-Card Diaries: Anna "I had my virginity 'taken' and I spiraled into depression and pushed everyone away"

Today we're highlighting Anna from New York, who believes a person's worth should not depend on what her sex life looks like. We really thank her for sharing a difficult personal story about sexual assault. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. Tell us about yourself:

I'm an 18 year old straight, cis female college student from New York. My absolute favorite thing to do is read, I laugh easily and often, and I love animals. I can talk for hours about feminism, movies, Doctor Who, or history. I make awesome brownies and cupcakes. Oh, and I'm a rape survivor.

How do you define virginity?

Virginity is a social construct put in place to shame women, I've found. It's also cis- and hetero-normative.

Tell us your story

By society's standards, I had my virginity "taken" from me at 15, by someone much older who used physical and emotional abuse to his advantage. I spent years hating myself and blaming myself for what had happened, as well as being thoroughly ashamed. I spiraled into depression and pushed everyone away. Now I feel that I've become stronger and want to try and help other people who have experienced rape or other abuse.

Any thoughts on virginity in our society?

I think that if someone wants to wait until they're married for p-in-v sex, that's their own choice. If someone doesn't, or they only want to do oral, or anal, or nothing at all, we should respect them. As a society, we should value people for who they are, not by their sexual decisions.