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V-Card Diaries: Renee "If you wait too long, you'll be too tall to ride, and life's tickets will run out"

Today we're highlighting Renee from Las Vegas, worries that if she can't get a guy while she's young, what will happen when she's older. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. Tell us about yourself:  

I will be 21 in a few days. I am currently living in Las Vegas, but originally from California.

How do you define virginity?

Never acting in a more platonic way to a person of sexual interest. Having never kissed someone, I believe there are several types of virginity.

Tell us your story:

I will be 21 in less than a week and I am still a virgin. I have never even held hands with a guy. I was always the different one in school, and I've done most of my life backwards. I was the ugly duckling in high school, and I haven't grown into the "swan". I graduated high school at 16, and college at 18. At that point I didn't put pressure on myself to get a boyfriend; I naively thought that it would just happen.

After college I moved to Paris, also known as "the city of love", for everyone but me. Even abroad, there wasn't a single person I was interested in. I moved around some more and finally ended up in Vegas, the single most disgusting city in the world (seriously, the locals here are like characters from a Rob Zombie film). Alas, I am eager to lose my virginity as 21 is really pushing it, but the problem is I have no guys who are interested. I am on several online dating sites, and no bites.

I keep myself up, and I'm not the worst thing out there, but it's very competitive. I'm also very tall and severe looking so that intimidates guys a lot. Being a virgin sucks simply for the fact that having sex is the most primal and normal of basic humans needs. To be a female and not be able to attract a guy for sex is really saying a lot. If I can't get a guy now while I am young and fertile, how am I going to get a guy when I'm older?

I think the media puts so much pressure on people about sex, because it's everywhere. Every ad has a sexual inneundo. Sex sells, especially in Vegas, and not being able to participate is like being deprived of water simply because the cap is still sealed. I've recently begun to think about losing it to a random guy in a bar to get it over with. I honestly don't think I'll have a boyfriend so there's no point in waiting for something that is never going to happen.

Being a virgin in today's society is more of a burden then a "gift", and the idea of being pure is a novelty that has run dry. How can someone be pure in this world when sex is all around us even if it's not happening to us? I don't think people should wait for that "special someone", because life is not a fairy tale, it is what you make of it. It's a experience that everyone should get the pleasure of trying, and to have to resort to uncomfortable measures as going to a bar is definitely a low point. Losing it in high school would probably be the easiest and safest way.

If I could say one thing to my former high school self I would say, " you only live once, you might as well do it right the first time, find a guy, be safe, and enjoy. If you wait too long, you'll be too tall to ride, and life's tickets will run out. The carnival doesn't stay in town forever, go while you still have a chance."