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V-Card Diaries: Anita "It wasn't a rite of passage, it was more like a painful medical procedure."

Today we're highlighting Anita in upstate New York, who had a tall boyfriend and likens her first time to getting a tooth pulled. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. Tell us about yourself:

I'm a 20-year-old woman living in upstate New York.

How do you define virginity?

Whatever you think it is. I have lesbian friends that have never had a penis inside them, but they're certainly not virgins! For me, it was vaginal intercourse.

Tell us your story

I lost my virginity at 16 to a guy I had been dating for a few weeks. I went through puberty fairly early, and I had been wanting to have sex for some time, so it wasn't a hard decision to make. However, it was a truly horrible experience. My boyfriend was a foot taller than me, and accordingly was very "big" was literally the worst pain I'd ever experienced in my life. I didn't feel any different afterwards; it wasn't a rite of passage, it was more like a painful medical procedure, like getting a tooth pulled.

We stayed together for two years, and since then I've only slept with three other people, which seems like a small number compared to my friends. The most important thing I learned about sex is that women create our own sexual pleasure; counting on the guy to do all the work doesn't cut it (and they don't really know what they're doing, either).