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V-Card Diaries: Diana "I was sexually abused as a child and am still working through this."

*Trigger warning for sexual assault* Today we're highlighting Diana in Europe, who is overcoming some sexual issues after a childhood trauma and a family who was very prudish about sex. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. A little about myself:

I am a 25 year old woman in Europe.

How I define virginity:

I don't think it's as simple as saying it's vaginal sex. I think I would define it as a moment of immense, positive emotional and physical connection with another person. In relation to the physicality of it, I absolutely believe that vaginal, anal, and oral are all definitive of sex.

Here's my story:

I have not had vaginal sex. I was sexually abused as a child and am still working through this. I am in a long term relationship with a man and we have had oral sex. We enjoy a certain amount of sexual intimacy and he is understanding of my past and is loving and patient, thankfully.

I also grew up in a very prude family in which sex was an extremely taboo subject. I grew up thinking that sexuality was dirty, forbidden and not for me. I now realize how damaging this was and am overcoming it more and more with every day that passes. I hope to one day trust my partner enough to have vaginal sex with him. I hope to transcend my fears and insecurities and achieve a new level of sexual fulfillment.

Many of my friends assume that I am having sex with my boyfriend in the vaginal sense. I don't bother to correct them as it is an intimate issue between me and him.

V-Card Diaries: Katherine "I'm so afraid of rejection that I don't know how to approach a guy I'm interested in."

Today we're highlighting Katherine in Europe. She doesn't think that men find her attractive and is afraid that her lack of sexual experience will make it even more difficult for her to find intimacy. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. A little about myself:

I'm 20, female, originally from the US and soon studying abroad in Europe.

How I define virginity:

In general terms, I'd say you're a virgin if you've experienced some sort of consensual genital contact. So for me, there's not that big a gap between, say, oral sex and penis-in-vagina sex if you're a heterosexual person.

Here's my story:

I'm twenty, and I'm entering another year without any sexual experience to speak of. I've never even held hands with a guy. I have only ever been on one date and it was this year, and I ruined it by being too nervous and confused to try and make a connection.

In junior high and high school, I was really self-conscious about my breasts. They started growing... and then stopped. I've worn the same bra size since I was 12 and you can buy it in the girls' section of the store. As I started to discover my sexuality, I also learned that guys like boobs, and the bigger the better. No one ever expressed interest in me, and I figured it was because of my small breasts.

I thought college would change things, because sex is supposed to be really easy to get there. But still, no one really expressed interest in me, except for a few guys I did not find attractive. I'm so afraid of rejection that I don't know how to approach a guy I'm interested in. What if he laughs at me? What if he tells his friends how this weird girl thought she stood a chance? I still don't feel like men find me attractive.

I feel like because I'm 20, everyone assumes I've had sex, so they'll be turned off if they find out I'm not experienced at all. I don't feel comfortable providing any information about my virginity on dating sites because I'm afraid it'll turn people off. I don't even know how to kiss! I've been masturbating for a while now, but I'm frustrated by this need for intimacy, combined with the inability to achieve it. I feel like I was supposed to learn how to do this in high school, but I've missed the boat and it's only going to get harder to catch up.