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Florida

V-Card Diaries: Adrian "By the time I graduated from high school, I had managed to completely bottle up my sexual impulses (a very bad thing!)"

A little about myself:

I'm a 21 y/o genderqueer college student from Florida!

How I define virginity:

I think that virginity is a state of never having had loving, safe, consensual sex before. But it's not really a big deal in the grand scheme of things - whether or not you've has sex before doesn't make you more or less of a person.

Here's my story:

When I was younger, I was obsessed with staying 'pure' because of the influence of my church and my parents. I was taught that being 'pure' meant keeping away from not only the physical act of sex, but also thoughts and self-inflicted actions that would stimulate sexual thoughts/activities. This was all fine and dandy until I got to 10th grade. It was like a switch had been flipped in my brain, and then suddenly every day was like terrible, horny, torture. I realized at that time that I was sexually interested in people of the same sex as well as the opposite sex, and a lot of people in-between. But I was too anxious about being judged by the people around me, so I kept it bottled up, and the more I tried to hide it the more those repressed thoughts came out to haunt me.

By the time I graduated from high school, I had managed to completely bottle up my sexual impulses (a very bad thing!). But then I moved away to college, and the new, sex-positive environment unraveled all my 'progress'. I fell into a deep depression, feeling as if nothing in the world was worth living - all because I couldn't keep my thoughts 'under control', based on what other people thought I should be doing with my body and mind! As you can tell, I was in a bad place, all because I had never given myself a chance to really understand and accept my sexual thoughts. I was stuck like that until I came across Scarleteen.com, a website that teaches young people about sex in a gentle, accessible, inclusive way. Exploring that website got me started on my journey to recovery.

Fast forwards to today, and I'm still a virgin. But I no longer beat myself up over thoughts that, through therapy and other activities, I've realized are natural. I don't put that much importance on virginity or 'purity' either way, as a positive or negative thing. My virginity 'is what it is', and when I feel like I'm close enough to someone to have sex with them, then it'll happen. I know that the day that happens won't be some magical event, but I hope that at the very least it'll be bearable! In the meantime, I'll keep working to improve my health, my friendships, my hobbies, my confidence, my career, and many more things.

If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here.

V-Card Diaries: Laura "I see a hot guy and the dirtiest thing that crosses my mind is I just want to stare at him all day."

Today we're highlighting Laura in Florida, who thinks she's demi-sexual because she needs a connection to become aroused. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. A little about myself: 21, Female, Florida

How I define virginity:

I'm not sure how to define virginity. It's complicated, I believe everyone has their own definition of what virginity is to them. For me, it's not having had sex. Which is still very vague–because there's lots of ways to have sex...so how do you pick what counts and what doesn't? It's confusing. Dictionary.com defines virginity as the condition or state of being a virgin, untouched, pure, fresh, or unused. Again..vague. So I came to a conclusion that virginity is just a thing, an experience someone hasn't had yet. Whatever that experience may be to that person - because it could be anything!

Here's my story:

My story is that I'm recently 21 and I'm a virgin. I've never even had a relationship before. AT 19, I (unfortunately) had my first kiss. (long story). But from that experience I learned a few things about myself. I am perfectly content being single. I've never had a relationship and I won't until it's right for me. And I'm still deciding whether or not I want to wait to have sex until marriage. Either way..it's going to be with my (future) husband. I have no doubts about that. It's not religious - it's just what I feel is right for myself. I also think I'm demi-sexual which means I don't experience sexual arousal unless I form a connection first. Seriously, I see a hot guy and the dirtiest thing that crosses my mind is I just want to stare at him all day..maybe get a hug. :P

V-Card Diaries: OwlShroomGirly "My boyfriend would annoy me until I agreed to have sex with him."

*Trigger Warning for sexual assault*Today we're highlighting OwlShroomGirly in Florida, who knows she deserves someone who loves her for who she is, regardless of her past. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. A little about myself:

I am 20 years old. I have a Pentecostal/Baptist background, thoughIi see myself as spiritual. I am currently in college (a Florida university). Being only 5'2'' I don't really stand out. I consider myself multi-ethnic (I have a medium brown pigmentation). I have a boyfriend who is multi-ethnic, though he is caucasian in complexion.

How I define virginity:

I honestly believe that the idea of virginity depends on the individual. There can even be spiritual virginities, if you want to go that far. I do.

Here's my story:

My first time was with a friend of mine. I was curious on my sexual orientation so, we experimented. It ended with both of us just wanting to be friends. That was my first consenting sexual experience. I had been sexually abused my a family member when I was a little girl and it still has a tendency to haunt me even with me being 20 years old. I had a boyfriend(first boyfriend), it was a terrible experience, he was forceful and would annoy me until I agreed to have sex with him. It took me years to figure out that I deserve someone who loves me just for me, regardless of what happened in my past. My current boyfriend has been understanding and accepting of all my past. I am confident in own life and what makes me, me is not my virginity but my personality and my principles.

V-Card Diaries: Too Busy to Worry "Because I have a poor body image, I seriously consider getting an escort."

Today we're highlighting Too Busy to Worry in Tampa, FL, who is looking for someone she'll be comfortable being naked around. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. A little about myself:

I am 27 years old, female, cis-gender, though I do lean towards being a tomboy and having very masculine traits. I live in Tampa, FL and have recently gone back to school by enrolling in the University of South Florida.

How I define virginity:

That a person hasn't had sex. That's a personal definition and I can't truly give a detailed definition of it.

Here's my story:

I am still a virgin for many reasons. I am no longer looking for Mr. Right but I would like to be with someone who I'm comfortable to be naked around. But that won't matter much because I have a poor body image so I seriously consider getting an escort. But then I think to myself, well, I could probably find a one-night stand just to get it over with, but then the body image thing pops up and the cycle starts again. Not to mention that I am so busy with school at the moment that losing my virginity is not high on my priority list. Not to mention that my friends don't bug me about it or when people do it just makes me dig my heals in more.