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Formerly religious

V-Card Diaries: Brianna "I look forward to having more sex in the future. I don't know if that takes away my C-card (Christian card). I hope not"

Writing from: Fairfield CA

Age: Early 20s

How I define virginity: A made-up patriarchal idea created to monitor the behavior and actions of women and create a culture of control and oppression.

I grew up in a very conservative, Christian household. I thought purity was the highest goal to attain and I bought into the Silver Ring Thing, I Kissed Dating Goodbye, and When God Writes Your Love Story courting culture up until I was a sophomore in college.

As my worldview broadened, I continued to think that I would save my virginity (at that time I defines as penile-vaginal intercourse) for marriage. I was dating my current boyfriend for 6 months when I decided to have intercourse with him. I was prepared for the worst case scenario, but I just really wanted to do it. I'd been told sex hurts for women, you'll feel  like a dirty, used bag if you do it outside of marriage, it'll ruin your relationship, etc.

When it happened, it wasn't painful at all. I didn't feel like a dirty, used rag. I honestly didn't feel any type of way about it except that it was enjoyable. For me it definitely wasn't the big deal that everyone made it out to be. I was in a committed relationship, with a loving and safe partner and I look forward to having more sex in the future. I don't know if that takes away my C-card (Christian card). I hope not.

If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. Find The V-Card Diaries here on most Wednesdays.

V-Card Diaries: Jennifer "I lost my virginity when I was 20, before I even went on my first date."

Today we're highlighting Jennifer in North Carolina, who broke free of her religious upbringing and came to terms with her body being HER body. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. A little about myself:

I'm 24, from North Carolina. I was raised very conservatively and did not choose to allow a man to be with me until I was 20, after I had broken free of my religious upbringing and come to terms with my body being MY body. I was raped when I was 19 but do not consider that to be my virginity. I am now active in women's rights and strongly believe that this is my body and I can do whatever I want to with it.

How I define virginity:

I do not believe there is a correct definition of virginity, it is different for everyone, as it should be. The only important thing is that you know you lose your virginity when you choose to, no one can forcefully take it from you. If you consider your virginity to be the first time you received oral sex, then that's it. If you think it's the first time you had intercourse, then that's it... it is up to each individual to define for their own body.

Here's my story:

I lost my virginity when I was 20, before I even went on my first date. I was at a guy's house who had planned a date with me for the next day, and as it got late we started to kiss (my first kiss as well) and one thing led to another. It was great and I don't regret it, I did not feel uncomfortable or nervous like many of my friends did because I waited until I was ready to do it instead of doing it just to get it done.