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V-Card Diaries: Sharon "I was (and am) very attractive and it makes me a little sad that I didn't get out there and find out"

A little about myself:

I'm British, was born in Germany, live in Scotland. I'm 51 and a speech and language therapist

How I define virginity:

I used to think it was penetrative sex, but recent reading makes me think it is a series of states, the first time you are touched, the first time you touch etc

Here's my story:

I was a very shy girl. My sisters were and are gorgeous and I felt eclipsed. I was plump and I was convinced that nobody would be interested, so I stayed at home........I used to iron my sister's clothes for her nights out!

But i was sexual, I had strong sexual feelings, I yearned, I fantasied, I masturbated and I stayed at home, totally convinced of my lack of attraction.

When I was 20 I was a very bad au pair in Germany, I lost my job and went to stay with family friends. I had an almighty crush on the husband and this resulted in having my very first kiss and sexual experience. We got naked a couple of times, he went down on me, (I nearly had a heart attack......but it felt fantastic). I was terrified, but very excited.............such an unsuitable man and situation.

I then yearned and replayed all of this for about 18 years, no sexual contact with anybody, nothing at all.

I'm now in my very late 30's, working in the Hebrides. I meet a man at a Ceilidh dance, he is interesting and funny and I fancy him. My friend and I go back to his house, I make it really clear that I fancy him............we end up kissing and I send the night, we do lots of extremely enjoyable things, but we don't have sex. I have a major crush on him, we hang out a lot, but no fun as he wants to be friends.

I go to Moscow on holiday, meet a sweet Scottish guy, who makes it very clear he fancies me, The attraction is mutual and we go back to his hotel room where we ALMOST have sex...............another enjoyable experience.

Still in the Hebrides, I'm at a dance, a man (Alec) crosses the dance floor to chat me up. Initially I'm not interested, but he is quirky and sexy and makes it clear that he finds me attractive. We have a kiss outside the dance..............I really like him.

I send flirty texts, which he responds to. I get an invitation to his house, he is high, funny, sexy and horny. We do lots of lovely things, (the man REALLY enjoys giving oral sex), but he is unavailable and taken. 

Now I'm 40, nearly 41 and I decide that I CAN NOT end the year as a virgin. I get back in touch with Alec, arrange to see him at his house. We sit at the kitchen table and drink tea, I am shaking when I kiss him and ask if we can go to bed. We go to bed, get naked and this is when I say i'm a virgin, Alec asks me why I took so long. We have sex twice, he was funny, kind , gentle and takes his time. It's all a bit of a blur, I remember it hurting, (I bled like a Scilian bride, which pleased me inordinately), but the touching kissing, oral etc was lovely.

As I said, Alec was unavailable, so it was a one night thing, but I got to choose who was the first based on mutual attraction and my steely determination that this was going to happen.
It didn't kick start sustained sexual exploration.................when I turned 50 I decided to pursue a decent sex life, because I do like having sex, my experiences have been uneven and I still feel unfufilled. 

I want to have fun finding out about it before it's all too late. Hindsight is a wonderful thing, looking back I can see that I was, (and am) very attractive and it makes me a little sad that I didn't get out there and find out.

If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here.

V-Card Diaries: Jayme "I had sex with the first boy I kissed. A Scottish guy in a kilt I met in Rome."

Today we're highlighting Jayme in the Bay Area in California, who lost her virginity in a 'pathetic but memorable' way while studying abroad in Rome. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. A little about myself:

A 22-year-old female originally from rural New York who now lives out on the West Coast in the Bay Area.

How I define virginity:

Penetrative sex.

Here's my story:

I had sex with the first boy I kissed. I was a twenty-year-old studying abroad with absolutely zero sexual experience. I had never so much touched a boy with any intent, nonetheless gotten naked with one.

I never talked about sex; the idea of revealing my lack of experience made me debilitatingly self-conscious. Whenever friends volunteered information about their boyfriends/girlfriends/ sexual histories, I would do my best to keep the attention on them lest anyone want to ask me a question.

I met a Scottish guy in a cobbled plaza in Rome. He wasn't astoundingly beautiful or particularly suave, but he was wearing a kilt and didn't laugh too hard when I pretended to know more about European football than I really did. He was staying mere steps from where we met. I pulled him up against a wall and kissed him, shocked by how easy it was. I kept saying, "I'm leaving tomorrow," as if that meant anything (to me, it did).

We had to walk past a group of his friends in the common area of their suite to make it to the bedroom. I didn't have time to get nervous; we were naked too quickly. Most of what happened should embarrass me, but remarkably I think it's all pretty funny - he had been drinking all day for a "rugby team initiation," so he could hardly get it up; his friends kept screaming from the other room; my phone kept ringing, a friend looking for me.

He was scared of my breasts. It was best when he used his fingers. After fifteen minutes, someone right outside the door yelled something and we both jumped up and out of bed. I said I had to go. Neither of us finished.

It wasn't particularly special; looking back, it was actually pretty pathetic. But it was memorable, and I don't have any qualms about how it happened.