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Texas

V-Card Diaries: Liz B. "He invited me over to his house and I of course went knowing what 'Netflix and chilling' meant"

A little about myself: 

I'm 17-year-old female student, born and raised in Houston, TX.

How I define virginity: 

I define virginity as a metaphor for one's innocence that is lost when one participates in sexual intercourse.

Here's my story: 

I was 16 when I was dating a guy from the soccer team. We barely had a month together, but there was something about him that completely had me hypnotized (maybe it was the whole bad boy thing?). Well one day he invited me over to his house and I of course went knowing what "watching Netflix and chilling" meant.

We started making out and of out no where we jumped right to it. It was Horrible! There was no foreplay, no nothing. The pain that Ii felt during sex was unbearable and we had to stop a couple of times. He finished fairly quick and then looked back at me shocked claiming " i didn't know you were a virgin" ... like really? My first time can be summed up to painful, akward, embarrassing. And pissed me off. i regret losing my virginity simply because all my friends were sexually active.

Check out Liz B. on Tumblr. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here.

V-Card Diaries: MyBodyNotYours "Part of me is shut off to sex, because I was sexually molested by a relative when I was 8."

*Trigger warning for Sexual Assault*Today we're highlighting MyBodyNotYours in Austin, Texas who doesn't feel emotionally ready to have sex after being sexually molested as a child. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here.

A little about myself:

Female, 21, Austin, Tx

How I define virginity:

Consented intercourse (penis in vagina, to be graphic)

Here's my story:

Virginity for me has been a struggle for most of my life. Until recently, I hadn't come to terms with what had happened to me as a child. At the age of 8, I was sexually molested by an older relative. After therapy, talking to my parents and confronting the relative, I've come to terms with what happened. A part of me wants to have sex, but another part of me has been shutoff to sex in general. I've struggled with boyfriends who don't understand why I just don't want to have sex. Someday I hope to have sex, but I'm still not quite ready emotionally from the damage that was done a long time ago.

V-Card Diaries: Megan "Sex is precious. My body is precious. It is only for THE one other person that will earn my trust."

Today we're highlighting Megan in Texas, whose Catholicism impacts how she things about sex and relationships. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. A little about myself:

I'm a 26-year-old female from Texas. I was born Catholic and still practice Catholicism. Naturally, this has a huge impact on how I was raised and how I see sex and relationships. But I also agree that people have different views, none of which I condone. I stick to my values, and I respect those who have different values and stick to them just as tightly. It's what makes them who they are.

How I define virginity:

I have my own personal definition of virginity: It simply means not being sexually intimate (all forms of sex; if it has the word "sex" behind it, it is indeed considered "sex" in my book; even being naked with a potential sex partner is close to the edge. But I'm a very private person anyway). Many people have different definitions of virginity, so it is my belief that they should stick to their morals when it comes to deciding whether or not they've lost "it." The term has become so muddled, it's impossible to come to a consensus on a definition.

Here's my story:

I'm single, and still a virgin at 26. I have felt shame at times, especially when I was younger, but as I have grown up and matured, I feel at peace with my decision to remain celibate until marriage. None of my friends care and none have asked me if I've ever "lost it", and I have never asked them. I feel that is out of respect for each other, and because it really doesn't matter in our friendships. Sex is a private matter, between two individuals who care deeply for each other. I've discovered a great deal about myself since leaving high school 8 years ago, and I know that I will be ready to let someone into my life when the time comes.

Indeed, religion has played a role in my decision, but I also never have felt like I was ready for an intimate relationship. I have to find the right person, and only then will I know I can let him intimately into my life, and we can share an experience that is the practice leading to the creation of new life as husband and wife. Sex is precious, my body is precious. My body is amazing, and it is only for THE one other person that will earn my trust and love me enough to be with me for the rest of my life. And I'm totally okay with our first time being messy and awkward, but that will give us a chance to grow and learn with each other throughout our lives.

Remaining a virgin has led me to realize that I have respected my body AND my emotions, because no one knows me better than me. Of course I've had sexual desires (I am human), and I definitely relish the thought of being intimate with a man. I have had opportunities, but remaining true to myself means more to me than giving myself away before I'm ready.

V-Card Diaries: Ida. Ho. "Don't have sex in the front seat of a car."

Our latest V-Card Diaries comes from Ida.Ho. in Texas, who took some risks the first time she had intercourse, from having some unprotected and rough tumbles in a car, to not taking Plan B afterwards. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. We'd love to run it in this blog. A little about myself:

I'm 18. I'm a pan-sexual female (shh don't tell my mother) and I'm a proud Texan, born and raised.

How I define virginity:

I was taught that vaginal penetration was the line where you lost your virginity. I've since re-thought it. I think losing your virginity includes oral sex. But let me tell about the first "conventional" time I had sex.

Here's my story:

You would have thought it was a porno how many positions he tried. J was never really a boyfriend guy friend from the summer before. I met him when I was 15 and he was 19. When I was 16 I snuck out the house to go see him because he texted me that it was an emergency. We hadn't spoken in over 6 months but he had a history of depression and suicide attempts so I was legitimately concerned. I half ran down the street in flip flops, my pajamas, and messy hair to his house. He was sitting in his car outside.When I climbed in he skipped the hello and the explanation of what was going on, he hugged me. He told me he just needed to see me. I sighed, glad he was okay.

I layed down and put my head on his lap, intent on cat napping while he warmed up to talking about what was going on. Since my eyes were closed I didn’t see the kiss coming. But one minute I was half asleep on his lap, and the next we were full on making out. I got up and straddled him, taking my top and bra off. The summer before he taught me a lot about my body. He showed me how to give a good blow job, all the great things you can do with breasts. He went down on me once. I didn’t cum and it was really awkward for both of us. So I’m comfortable with him. Suddenly he says “I wanna do it.”

Despite me asking him several times the summer before he never wanted to take my virginity. I got off him and took the rest of my clothes off. I was ready. It took me five minutes to convince him. We didn’t have a condom. I started out riding him but couldn’t really do it. Then on my back. Then doggy style. Then three other positions. By the time he was done I had a concussion, my head had been knocked around so many times. DON’T HAVE SEX IN THE FRONT SEAT OF A CAR. He handed me a handful tissues and informed me I was bleeding. I tried to clean up a little before putting my clothes back on.

Then he said “Will you do something for me?” I said “Anything. He drove me to the local drug s tore. He sent me in to buy a plan B pill. I walked in and asked how much it cost. The guy behind the counter told me $40. I went back to the car and asked him for the money. He wiped blood off my face and said “What kind of hard core car sex did we have?” I bought the pill. He dropped me off at home, quickly explained what it did and sent me on my way.

I never took the pill. I wasn’t interested in starting my period right away. I was going on vacation the next day. My brother was up when I walked in. I know I looked a wreck. He didn’t say anything. J and I haven’t spoken since.

V-Card Diaries: Dru "Losing your virginity in the Bible Belt is a huge deal, something girls instantly regret afterwards"

Today we're highlighting Dru in North Texas, who thought the inaccurate advice she got in Sex Ed was appalling and disgusting. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here.

A little about myself:

I am 21 years old, a woman, and I live in North Texas.

How I define virginity:

The first sexual act between me and the partner of my choice.

Here's my story:

I may be the only 21 year old woman in my small town that has yet to lose her virginity. Losing your virginity in the Bible Belt is a huge deal. It is something that girls instantly regret afterwards, and guys revel in. The girls go to school the next day and tell their friends, not with a big smile on their face, but with a face full of regret and sadness. And the guys get to go to school with a smile and twinkle in their eye, and when telling their friends, the get high-fives and hugs. I never wanted to regret it, and I never wanted to be the reason some asshole got a high-five.

Everybody around me told me that having sex before I was married was a shameful thing to do and that my virginity was so precious that if I gave it away to just anybody that I was trash in the eyes of god. The only sex education that I received was that if you had sex with multiple partners that you would most definitely receive an STD. They showed us pictures of genital warts and told us exactly how they were "removed." It scared the shit out of me.

They taught us that condoms didn't work, and that birth control wasn't healthy for girl's bodies. Now that I look back on the sex ed that I received, I am appalled. They taught us that when we got older, the man that we would marry most definitely wanted a "new product" and not a "used one." That if we had pre-martial sex, then we would be taking something away from our husbands that "belonged" to them. It was disgusting. And the even more disgusting thing was that I completely believed them. I completely believed the lies that they jammed into our brains.

And now, I am a proud feminist and a proud atheist. I no longer believe that my virginity is "god-given", and that it "belongs" to my future husband. I no longer believe that I will most definitely get a STD if I have sex with multiple partners. I acknowledge the fact that I could receive some kind of STD, but that if I use condoms and speak up about getting tested, then the probability of me receiving one is lowered. I believe that my body belongs to me and when I do decide to have my first sexual encounter with a man that I trust, then nothing inside me will change and I will still be Dru.

V-Card Diaries: Miss Understood "I am a liberal atheist with multiple tattoos and a potty mouth, but I've never even kissed a boy."

Today we’re highlighting Miss Understood in Texas who hasn't so far found a guy worth having. When she does, then 'hallelujah.' If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. A little about myself:

I am twenty years old, almost 21!!! Woo woo! I am a female from the big bad state of Texas.

How I define virginity:

Having never been intimate with another person on a physical level.

Here's my story:

I am a liberal atheist with multiple tattoos and a potty mouth. Because of this I can't be a virgin. But I am, I've never even kissed a boy. (Or girl I guess) My reasoning for being a virgin is because I haven't found a guy who is worth having it. When he does come along and we trust each other, I won't see a problem with things progressing.

Most of my closest friends are the same way except they are waiting until marriage. This is totally fine, but I don't think that has to be the way. I see no problem with people being what some call "sluts". I think that as long as you do it safely and you are happy about it then it is perfectly fine. For me it's more about being comfortable with myself. Why would I reveal all this to a guy if I'm not happy about myself. Once I get there and find a really great guy then hallelujah.

V-Card Diaries: Cas "I was abused, sometimes in front of the teacher, with no intervention."

**Trigger warning for sexual assault and self-harm** Today we're highlighting Cas in Edmonton, Canada, who was sexually abused at age six and raped at age twelve. Now, at fifteen, Cas is no longer afraid. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. A little about myself:

I'm a fifteen-year-old genderqueer individual residing in Edmonton, Alberta. I'm currently supporting myself and working a full time job.

How I define virginity:

Virginity is a social concept reaching back into the ages where women were property and 'virgins' worth more than those who were 'tainted.'

Here's my story:

At age six I was sexually abused. This was my first introduction into sexual intercourse. I know it involved oral rape. That is all I care to remember.

I moved from my home town to Texas when I was ten.

At age twelve I was raped by the boys in my school. I was grabbed, I was abused, sometimes in front of the teacher, with no intervention. I was told I deserved it. No one deserves that torture. Due to intense bullying and a complete lack of social support, I attempted suicide. I was sent to a mental facility for ten days, and outpatient therapy for three months. I did not divulge the information regarding my sexual abuse, largely due to the fact that I had repressed many of the memories. Later that year I moved back.

I was not raped again, but my social skills were destroyed, my trust in masculine figures nonexistent. And my parents were on the edge of divorce as I dealt with kids throwing apples, rocks, pine cones, and pens at me. They also grabbed my breasts and backside, and told me I was oversensitive when I screamed at them never to touch me. I attempted suicide twice that year, both failed.

Fourteen, first consensual kiss. Back to school. School is not bad, but I am suffering from flashbacks and nightmares, and severe depression. Fifteen, November, I attempt suicide a final time. I am in the hospital for a week for potential liver failure. Then, I leave.

This is all essential to my sexual history. A month after I move out, I have my first orgasm. My sexual début was with a nineteen year old girl, and a dildo. It was very nice. Three months later, a man and I engage in sexual intercourse. And I am no longer afraid.

V-Card Diaries: Late Blooming Lesbian "My ring went from 'True Love Waits' to 'I'm an adult who can make adult decisions' "

Today we're highlighting Late Blooming Lesbian in Texas, who started dating late, but knows she is a lesbian through and through. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. A little about myself: 25, Female, Texas

How I define virginity?

Lack of penetrative sex

Here's my story:

I have had 3 boyfriends and 1 girlfriend. Weird, right, especially since my name clearly says LESBIAN? Ha ha. Well, I grew up in a fairly religious home and was "saving myself,"even had a ring from my dad that said "true love waits." I got it at 13 and lost my V-Card at 24.

I didn't date in high school. I was concerned with academics and socializing. I lived vicariously through friends experiences of sex and other things of that nature. It all just seemed complicated and messy. I had too many friends lose out on things like friends, a high school degree and even their home due to sex. I knew what it all was, as my mom had gone over it at appropriate stages and in terms I understood. I did however delve into the world of cyber sex. That was my outlet.

There I could be anything I wanted and do anything to any one. I discovered the best way to describe a blow job, how I would undress myself or them if I was there, and sex. I had watched porn and, in true nerd fashion, a 12 part documentary about sex. I was amazing... in writing. I wrote nightly erotic that would make anyone blush. I would then start to allow myself to watch porn simultaneously to chatting with these guys. They almost always picked girl on girl. I was totally ok with that cause that is what got me off. But my upbringing never encouraged sexiness. I wore very little make up and conducted myself as the jeans and a t-shirt gal who was so cool she was one of the guys.

After high school I dated a friend, T, for 2 months. We never got any further than him being my first kiss, yes, at 18. I went off to college and again I was too concerned with other things and the thought that some magical person would approach me , woo me and screw me. I didn't date anyone until E. When I really think about it, I have always been attracted to women but I was never brave enough to say anything other than ogle them from afar or in porn. E lucked out because even though I wasn't necessarily sexually attracted to him, he showed me that attention; crowning him the first to do so. I ate that up! I suddenly, for the first time, felt sexy. I saw myself in a whole new light. Albeit I never had "sex", I had had one drunken encounter with T, months before E, that almost led to it but I wasn't really into it. So I have him a handy and rolled over to sleep. A few months in to my relationship with E, I realized that my ring on my finger had changed meaning for me. It had gone from "true love waits" to "I'm an adult who can make adult decisions". So on to Planned Parenthood to get on the pill. Fast forward through drama and heart ache, I never needed it, now 22 and still a virgin. 2 years alone and some self discovery later I say to myself "I wanna go to a gay club and see what I can pull, cause F this, I wanna be happy!" Never went but I met my wonderful lovely amazing girlfriend.

Now those of you who are this far I'm sure are thinking, " didn't she say 3 boys and 1 girl..." Yes I did. I met my girlfriend at work and my kinda boyfriend there too. I was talking to her, R, and met her best friend BB. She and I hit it off and were inseparable from day one. Well, BB took an interest and I had confided in R that, while I was super into her, I hadn't been with anyone, at all. She then made a plan: I date them both, shared time and such, to see where I stood.

R took my V-Card. We were at her parents house. I met them as the friend. We went out drinking and got loose and comfy. We had only kissed and touched a little beforehand. But this was the big night. I was so excited because she turned me on in a way I never felt or knew possible. When we got back we changed and laid down, really casually. We started slowly and sweetly, just kissing, until she made a move and blew my mind. I was experiencing feelings and emotions I had never had. She "kissed her" as we like to call going down on one another. It was amazing! Who knew! I wasn't ready to give back like that but I was eager to touch and feel.

I knew where I wanted to be but BB was so into me and I kinda wanted to "make sure" I guess, or I just liked being the center of attention, no to mention sexual attention. It went on for about a month or so, and a three-some was brought up and attempted, but not until I broke it off with him. It was my birthday present to him, thoughtful friend, I know. As I had already had a form of sex, my girlfriend was a little nervous that I would like "the real thing" more. She purchased a strap-on. We used it and boy that was even more amazing. I found I am surely not quiet. BBs birthday rolled around and his present was given. I found myself grabbing, staring, and longing for R, not him. He finally "put it in" and nothing. Nothing! I was not excited or anything. I was as quiet as a mouse. He did his thing and I tried to enjoy it but when he was done I rolled over to R and proclaimed, I'm a lesbian, through and through.

V-Card Diaries: Eddie " “I am one of those few men that still values my own virginity like a treasure."

Today we're highlighting Eddie in Houston, who believes that virginity is a treasure you share with the person who is The One. If you want to tell your story, go to our submission form. You can find all our V-Card Diaries here. About me: 

I'm 17, male and Latin. I live in Houston right now. I'm Catholic I really enjoy going to church and chatting with my friends in a group named Getsemani.

How I define virginity:

I believe that a virgin is someone who hasn't had a sexual intercourse. In other words, you lose your virginity if you put your penis inside someone, or the other way, someone put his penis inside you. I also believe that virginity is the most valuable thing of body. It's a treasure that you lock so, when you find that person that really is the one, you can share all the riches together.

My story:

I don't know how to start on this one so I will go with the beginning. When i was in Junior High I wasn't really a chick magnet or anything and it was fine. I think that is when I first though of virginity. I grew up like a normal teenager, everything was fine and then I go to high school. Here it's like everybody isn't a virgin anymore, so I'm one of the few men that didn't lose their virginity. Some people have made fun of me, some people have being really respectful, even they admire my goal.

My point is that, maybe you are one of those few men that still value his own virginity like a treasure. If you are one of those, or one of those girls who even when they don't know their future husband yet she is already loving him be keeping herself pure, you are not alone. Maybe you are feeling like some weird creature but trust me, there will always be people who wait for their loved ones. The problem is that those who don't are noisier.